encendi un cigarrillo
mientras trato de enganchar mis ojos con los tuyos.
planto y riego las semillas
que te dirigiran hacia mi
pero no vas, no las recojes porque no me notas
y mi cigarrillo se va acabando con los minutos
y veo que mi estuche desea darme solo uno mas.

te miro platicar y sonreir con tus amigas
con bebida en mano y en la otra,
veo que traes el sueño de sostener la mia.
La musica dentro sigue y yo nos sentia
bailando cerca muy cerca y tu me susurrabas
todos los secretos de la alegria.

Los musicos terminan y la barra sirve la ultima bebida
y tu sorprendida te dirijes hacia esa puerta de salida
que me amenaza con separarar nuestras vidas.
Yo quise correr y derrumbar las mesas vacias
y te mire salir. y me robaste mi aliento
y me siento aun mas dentro
cuando al salir ya no te puedo distinguir.

me abrazo a mi mismo entre lo frio
y le imploro a la noche por tu nombre.
me contesta solo con un vientecillo
que se desvanece entre aciago suspiros
y las cenizas de mi ultimo cigarrillo.

drinking from a bottle i see through its glass a fogginess. A cloudy loneliness that reignites a memory. A memory that exists as a terse expression narrating my entire life. It is the reflection of a love that came to offer its heat, evolved into a fire and ended in a cold that my body has yet to learn to forget.

She, whose name is better left in the fog, came into my life and ripped me out as a weed. I became entangled in a paradise where I learned to yield, root by root, all traces of selfishness. We lived day by day, with the years passing by. The world danced and it sang only for us, offering us the smile of an infinite spring.

and that one day came. following behind it a single black cloud which willed itself to wither all trace of my life under its shadow. And I saw her sigh, that woman, with both of her eyes looking at me in peace. Those brown eyes that slowly sunk into the black. They narrated the story of a past time, and I cried to them for one more day, and in that instant, as if only a few seconds had passed, i returned to a life without her.

And so i passed on to live, day by day; i grew old, and with the years, i faded. The world, with its song went on, I stopped listening. I wasted myself pleading to each dawn to take me to the woman who keeps all my joy. And so, here i am, lost with a bottle in hand, astray in a fog which reminds me, drop by drop, that those times will never come back.

once there were two-
today i can only hear me.
i look up to the clock
and the time agrees to one.
how much time has passed
without acknowledgment where we had been?
how much love has passed through
that the minutes finally caught up with destiny?

it feels as if the temptation of rain
will finally arrive to dissolve what little remains
i feel that this time around i will just step back inside
and wait. wait by the front door for you.

do you think that maybe if you return
perhaps we could get lost in certainty?
you could hold my arm and i’d hold yours
i would carry an umbrella to cover us
from whatever the weather threatens us with

yet here i am
staring onto the clock
time agrees many months are now gone.
and i still wait here inside
without acknowledgement or where you’ve been
i wonder how much love we have now lost
and how much have you already found.

it feels as if the temptation of rain
has finally consumed and dissolved me into grains of pain
i feel that this time around i will not make it outside
i will stay and wait. wait by the front door for you.

this morning i see over the horizon more blues than yellows
i see trees dancing a tango with the wind
with each step allowing their leaves
to drop as a dress over a cold ground.

autumns are always welcomed with frigidity.
this year more than others, it will not be different.
this sun feels so heartless.
how dare it not bring down its heat
when i feel so cloudy today?

i wish i could notice and learn,
perhaps for the very first time,
how to get free of my own leaves.
allow my thoughts to meander,
and with a graceful wind, to dance.

with the pressure of each step i announce my presence.
this world knows me. Perhaps it remembers me.
i transform into its rain and, within the cold, a sin.
my feet fuse with the decayed fruit that captivates its fields;
my fingers, as lightning, crash over the earth.

i wish i could succumb into the forgotten
with each judgment settled, as this, i remain silent.
within its entrails i hide and i whispher, thank you
for that one time it offered me everything.
for each tear and kiss of joy and sadness.
I finally undestand. thank you for sharing another autumn.
With my thoughts fixed upon you, within me,
i aim my eyes and i become covered in blues while i listen,
perhaps for the last time, to the calm of existence.

esta manaña veo en el horizonte mas azules que amarillos
arboles que bailan un tango con el viento
en cada paso dejando deslizar sus hojas
como vestidos que caen sobre un suelo frio

los otoños siempre se reciven con frigidez
este año mas que otro, no sera diferente
este sol se siente tan desalmado
como no atreverse bajar el calor
cuando hoy me siento tan nublado?

quisiera tomar nota y aprender,
quizas por primera vez,
como desacerme de mis hojas.
dejar mis pensamientos serpentear
y con un aire gracil, bailar.

con la presion de cada paso anuncio mi presencia
este mundo me conoze. talvez me recuerda
me convierto en su lluvia y entre este frio en un pecado
mis pies mesclandoze con la fruta marchita
que ahora hechiza sus campos
mis dedos como relampagos
estrellandose sobre el polvo.

quisiera someterme a lo olvidado
con cada juicio saldado, y asi, me quedo callado.
me escondo en sus entrañas y le susurro gracias
por aquella vez que me ofrecio todo.
por cada lagrima y beso de alegria y de tristeza
por fin entiendo; gracias por compartir otro otoño.
con mis pensamientos clavados sobre ti, dentro de mi,
dirigo mis ojos y me cobijo en su azul mientras escucho,
quizas por ultima vez, la calma de la existencia.

[the ugly translation to my earlier post]

Daily Glory

a perfectly timed desire
came to me this morning.
what else could one want
but an immortal desire
with a sensation without pace.

I defer to a bath of grays,
I hang on to a cup of coffee
and I direct my body towards a sun
that sings in yellows and reds
and happily smiles.
it plucks me and levitates me.
i sense it taking me to Paris.
beside me an emotion with passion
challenging me, accumulated,
telephoning the world:
I am the sound of your voice.

here comes twelve o’clock
and i cannot find my passport
the schedule reads eleven
and with my funds at the opposite pole
I splash cold water onto me
I smile and sigh
another pleasure quietly collapsed
by the trickery of the day-to-day.

Gloria a diario

esta mañana me llego
un deseo puntual.
que mas quisiera uno
que un deseo inmortal
con un efecto sin velocidad

me someto a un baño de gris,
me cuelgo una taza de cafe
y dirijo my cuerpo hacia un sol
que canta amarillos y rojos
y sonrie tan feliz.
me arranca y me levanta.
siento que me lleva a Paris.
a mi lado una emocion con pasion
desafiando, acumulado,
telefoneando al mundo:
yo soy el son de tu voz.

aqui llegan las doce
y no encuentro el pasaporte
el horario dice salida a las once
con mis fondos en el otro polo
me salpico agua fria
sonrio y suspiro
otro placer tranquilamente derrumbado
por las mañas de lo cotidiano.